I gladly take a "chunkette", as Karen Salmansohn would say, out of her many cool and psychologically enlightening views about relationship pleasure vs. relationship happiness.
One of Aristotle’s big philosophies is that many people are unhappy because they foolishly confuse pleasure for happiness—when the two are incredibly different.
1. Pleasure is about immediate gratification and merely brings temporary joy—which is
unsatisfying in the long run. Basically, pleasure is all about immediate fleeting gratification of the body and ego.
2.Happiness creates long-haul joy,because it is all about growing into your highest potential-your best favorite you. True happiness comes when you surround yourself with people and experiences which increase your soul's self development-hence the joy last as long as you last-because the joy created becomes an integral part of who you are as a unique,thriving individual.
-Karen Salmansohn,Prince Harming Syndrom!
Let's take an astrological /psychological/ energetic look as to why some of us out there can't seem to pass go when it comes to relationships. Do we have a relationship expiration date built into our astrological charts? Are we energetically spinning at such a low vibration that we attract similar energy or could it also be that we are magnetic, highly functional, vivacious beams of light, wildly spinning with upbeat energy which leaves us wide open to attract energy vampires, the ones who can't seem to generate their own power so they steal ours. Face it...even the moth knows to go to the flame. The challenge lies in differentiating between pleasure and happiness. Karen Salmansohn concisely points out in her book, Prince Harming Syndrome! all of the tell tale signs of a Prince Harming and also shows you how to really sit and ask yourself certain questions as to why you even want this person in your life in the first place.
Astrologically some relationships are very Karmic. The nodes of the Moon and Saturn in our birth charts will light the path as to what we sowed in a past life to bring about the current situations in this life. The sign that the nodes of the Moon and Saturn are in along with the house placement in your birth chart will show you to what degree you have your Karma. The seventh house of your birth chart will give you a look at the types of long term relationships you have where as the fifth house of the chart will show you the types of fleeting affairs that are likely to come about in your life. The astrological factors in your birth chart are a blue print of the potential relationship model built into your persona but the igniting match for all of these aspects is your thought iintention. How do you want things to play out? We need to look at the psychological make up and needs of the ego, which is the wall between our authentic , spiritual, energetic self and the "all for show", me first self. The ego wants to be constantly validated by having what is considered in the material world , to be of value. Some of us will take on a relationship that isn't good for us just so we can say that we have someone in our life.
Over the years I have given many astrological and intuitive readings on the subject of relationships. Until you find someone who is your true compliment you will run the risk of unknowingly and energetically seeking out your "own", yes I did say "own" insecurities and ego wants through the people that you choose to vibe with. If you feel bad and have low flying energy, well it stands to reason that you will attract the same type of energy through either a person or situation which will oblige your own thinking about yourself . Not a good situation! Feeling undeserving of love will attract someone who will validate that thought. We need to keep a constant check on our intuitive gauges that are built into our chakra centers,the energy vortexes of the body. Feeling good about yourself isn't a guarantee that you will attract someone that is good for you. The risk of attracting an energy vampire, someone who wants to rip off your energy is a scary possibility. Boundaries,caution and an ego kept in check are all necessary measures of psychic self defense when getting into the relationship ring.
Think about all of your past emotionally exhausting relationships. The ones with an expiration date. Use them as examples for what you don't want. Consider them your personal ex-files. Work with the astrological energy built into your birth chart and be savvy about how to recognize your intuitive gut feelings when it comes to the people that you let into your very personal space. Go with what you feel about the relationships you get into and not with what the ego dictates. Like Karen Salmansohn points out in her book, Prince Harming Syndrome!,know the difference between fleeting pleasure and true happiness.The universe likes balance and when things are out of balance something or someone will tip over. Learn your Karmic past life lessons so you are not destined to keep repeating the class. Keep your energy high, respect both your and your partners boundaries and if it doesn't feel good then honey, it ain't good. Let your goal be to have your relationship be an exhilarating, exceptional, exciting experience and not one that needs to end with an exorcism!
Keep your intentions in check, live in a state of awareness and please, please dont't impose your expectations of what you want from a relationship onto someone else. Let things develop naturally. If it is goood then it is good. If it is bad then get the hell out of there and stop coloring outside of your energetic lines.
Remember you are responsible for what you let happen to you and astrological, intuitive and psychological insight can only help you stay on your path. Your free will and personal choices are all up to you.